Holiday Survival Skills

Holiday Survival Skills

by | Dec 17, 2024 | Eating Disorders, Holidays

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Holiday survival skills are in demand as we navigate the busy and often stressful season.

Popular strategies being shared this year focus on maintaining physical health, managing emotions, and balancing social dynamics:

There are a lot of stressors whether you feel busy or not.

First, when we look at how to survive over the holidays determine how you will take care of your body.

Everyone knows it is important to take care of your body and that it can become complicated over the holiday season.

Here are some strategies to take care of your body this holiday season.

  • Stay active in a way that works for you. Since it is the time of year when it is darker earlier, consider what activities you need to keep your body feeling good.
  • Eat foodsthat work with your body. I like asking the question, what is your right food. Wonder to yourself if this food will give you the energy to do the things you need to do.
  • Notice if you tend to try to restrict what you want to eat. This restriction can have the opposite effect and lead you towards binge eating. Recognizing there are special foods for this time of year can help you have the holiday foods that you want to have.
  • Are you sleeping well or enough? Sleep is critical to your overall health. This time of year, we can have a varied sleep schedule due to activities. Look at how you can get your right amount of sleep.

Second, making sure you are focused on YOUR mental health and emotional wellness is a key to holiday survival.

The busy atmosphere can make us tend to override our mental health and emotional needs.

Try some strategies to help with keeping your emotional needs in mind.

  1. Acknowledging and addressing holiday-specific challenges, such as loneliness, grief, or dealing with family conflicts, can help maintain emotional well-being. These emotions can take a hold of us and affect how to maintain our balance.
  2. Try techniques like setting boundaries, practicing gratitude, or taking some space from others when you feel out of balance.
  3. If you feel too overwhelmed, seeking therapy can be helpful. Look for a qualified mental health therapist to help you if you are feeling down.

Third, evaluate what stress management skills you need for yourself this holiday season.

Here are some key tools to distress.

  • Is your schedule overloaded? Try decluttering your schedule. What is your intention for this holiday season? What do YOU want to accomplish: rest, connecting with special people, taking a trip, or being active are some of the questions you can ask yourself.
  • Evaluating what you need to let go of in your schedule can be valuable. You have permission to say no to people and activities that do not serve you this holiday.
  • Prioritize your self-care can be life affirming. Ask yourself the question, what would bring me peace. What do you need to do for YOU? I ask myself these questions to help me practice more self-care.
  • What is it you would like to do? Do you have a list of what you want to do this holiday season? I like using my Holiday Bucket list to determine my priorities

I write out my Holiday Bucket List every year. This is my list of what I want to do over the holiday season.

What are the things this holiday that you want to do?  Here are some questions to guide you in the right direction.

  1. What foods you want to have?
  2. What foods do you want to make?
  3. What kind of activities would you like to do?
  4. Where would you like to go?
  5. What decorations do you want to put up.
  6. Do you desire some rest or more activities?
  7. What are crafts/decorating that bring you joy.
  8. Where would you like to go over this holiday season?
  9. What does this season mean to you and how can you embrace that?
  10. What are your spiritual needs? What can you do to support your spiritual needs.

I find it is helpful to take my list and put it in on my calendar.

Lastly look at the social and family dynamics playing out around you.

Determine what YOU need for yourself and preparing to ask for what you need can be critical.

  1. If you must manage challenging conversations- this can be the time to practice boundaries. I like coming up with my plan before the difficult conversation happens.
  2. Navigating differing values within families can be a concern over the holidays. It can be helpful to prepare your response to intrusive questions.
  • I like planning neutral; inclusive activities can make gatherings smoother and there is less time for inappropriate statements from others.
  • I like to pivot the conversation away from challenging topics, so I have some non-controversial topics prepared: weather, vacations, or sports.
  • Being prepared to say, I don’t want to talk about this, is valuable. You can practice what you will say in advance. I like to ask the person bringing up a controversial topic- Why are you bringing this up? What is your intention? This helps you understand where they are coming from and set some limits.
  1. Who do you really want to spend time with? Who are the right people to spend time with? You deserve to spend time with people that are pleasant and enjoyable.

I encourage you to set yourself up for success. You are worthy of an enjoyable holiday.

Make this your time to connect with yourself and others that you truly care about.

Check out the Feed Your Soul with Kim Podcast where we talk about Holiday Survival Skills.

Kim McLaughlin, MA is a Psychotherapist, Speaker, Author, and Coach who specializes in working with people who suffer from binge eating and emotional eating. She is a Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor. She is the author of the best-selling book Feed Your Soul Nourish Your Life! A Six Step System to Peace with Food and the Amazon #1 Best Selling book Discovery Your Inspiration.

You can find Kim on her podcast Feed Your Soul with Kim and you can find it on all podcast platforms.

Wondering if you are an emotional eater? Sign up for the free Am I an Emotional Eater Quiz.

Thrive this holiday season

Thrive this holiday season

by | Dec 21, 2022 | Holidays

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Surviving seems to be the goal over the holidays. Seeing if we can just make it through the holidays and get to the end is the goal.

Getting to the place of thriving over the holidays can seem unattainable. Thriving can seem unreachable, because of all we have come to believe we must DO each holiday season.

How about imaging thriving as the goal? What would that look like?

  • Slowing down.
  • Be Mindful.
  • Spend money in a reasonable manner.
  • Use your time in a way that is enlivening.

I have been imagining (and practicing) how I can thrive this holiday.

Let’s start by looking at how is stress and overwhelm is showing up for you.

  • Start by identifying what the overwhelm looks like.

Some helpful ways to connect with overwhelm is to journal and meditate. Get quiet to see how the stress and overwhelm are showing up for you.

  • Are you responding to others’ expectations of you?

You might be feeling the need to always say yes. Thinking this is tradition. This is “what we always do.” Expectations can be overwhelming.

  • Are you feeling scared about being around food?

Wondering how much food will there be? Will I eat too much? Will I be judged. Will I drink too much?

  • Are you feeling bad about your body and how you look.

Feeling afraid others will notice your size and comment on it or disapprove of it? Or you just do not feel comfortable in your own skin.

  • How is stress showing up in your body?

Stress can show up as sickness or feeling physically bad.

  • Are you feeling fearful of not having enough time or money.

Time and money are limited resources and this time of year we think we have more than we actually do.

Money can become a problem when we rely on credit cards to pay, and we go into debt. Time becomes a problem when we do not plan well and become reactive.

Next, make a plan to manage the stress.

  • A great technique is to ask yourself, “What is the stress and overwhelm trying to tell me?”

The feelings are informative and can provide a guidepost if you let it. Then sink into the question, “What do I really want?”

I recently became sick, and I asked my body what it was trying to tell me. I realized I was too overscheduled, and my body was saying I needed to rest more. The sickness MADE me have to rest and I did.

  • It can be helpful to plan to incorporate food into your holiday. Food can be a huge trigger this time of year.

A helpful strategy is to eat 3 meals a day. Eat what you normally eat. Don’t save up for the “big meal,” because this is a set up to restrict/binge/shame. When we do not eat regularly, our body thinks we are restricting, and it will lead you to crave food and overeat.

  • You might wonder if you need to say no to sugary treats?

Not allowing yourself to have sugary treats can set you up to binge. If you deny what you want ultimately when emotions show up, you will have less resolve to not eat the sugary foods. Instead of denying yourself, allow yourself to have what you want. When you are eating regular meals and allowing yourself treats, there is less likelihood that you will binge. If you do binge, forgive yourself and move on. Being stuck in anger and resentment about overeating will NEVER lead to a change in behavior.

  • Set limits on others AND yourself? Say no to what does not work for you.

This is the time of expectations other can have of us. What is it that you want to do? Do that!

Where is your NO to other people? What will you do, and won’t you do? I think it is a time to have more no’s than yes’. It is ok to say no to a past family tradition, if they are not what you want this year. Doing things for others because we think we have to leads to overwhelm and stress. Let’s do it differently this year.

Lastly, we tend to put expectations on ourselves. We think we need to bake, clean, buy, go out, etc. We think we need to maintain holiday traditions. Take a deep breath and determine if this still fits for you. Say no when you need to.

This holiday is an opportunity to thrive.

First, focus on what is right for you? Yes, you can be limited in the activities that you do. Time is a limited resource, use it wisely.

I have decided I want more rest and peace this holiday season.  Being in front of the twinkling lights is thriving for me.

Second, coping strategies are really thriving strategies. Say no as you need to. Ask for what you want. Set your expectations on time and money.  Eliminate the stressors. Take that internal check to see what stresses you and find a way to let go of the stressor.

Third, what is your reason for the season?

  • What is this holiday about for you?
  • What do you want to be, do, have after the holiday?
  • What do you want to come away with after the holiday? Focus on making this happen.

My desire for this holiday is to experience more peace, light, joy, and love. My plans for this holiday are designed to meet that desired goal.

Lastly, be intentional about this holiday to get all the goodness out of it.

Kim McLaughlin, MA is a Psychotherapist, Speaker, Author, and Coach who specializes in working with people who suffer from binge eating and emotional eating. She is a Certified Intuitive Eating Counselor. She is the author of the best-selling book Feed Your Soul Nourish Your Life! A Six Step System to Peace with Food and the Amazon #1 Best Selling book Discovery Your Inspiration.

You can find Kim on her podcast Feed Your Soul with Kim and you can find it on all podcast platforms.

Wondering if you are an emotional eater? Sign up for the free Am I an Emotional Eater Quiz.